Disclaimer: The following blog reflects my personal opinions and views on the subject discussed. It is based on my own experiences, perspectives, and interpretations.
Ah, Tewkesbury Borough Council. The shimmering beacon of bureaucracy, the paragon of public service efficiency, and—lest we forget—the Olympic gold medalists in Ignoring Neurodivergent People Who Just Want Some Peace and Quiet.
Let’s set the scene. You’re neurodivergent. Maybe autistic. Maybe dealing with sensory processing issues. All you want is to exist in your own home without feeling like your ceiling is going to collapse because your upstairs neighbour just discovered the magical world of surround sound bass boosted mayhem.
Naturally, you turn to your local council—the people sworn to protect residents from antisocial behaviour and support vulnerable individuals. Surely, they’ll help, right?
Wrong. So wrong. Like, ‘putting toothpaste on toast’ wrong.
Here’s how Tewkesbury Borough Council handles noise complaints from people like us:
Step 1: Ignore the Noise. Gaslight the Complainer.
You report a noise issue. They tell you it’s “within acceptable decibel levels”—as if that means anything to someone who has a sensory meltdown every time the neighbour’s dog farts.
Bonus points if you’re told you’re being “overly sensitive.” Because being neurodivergent is obviously a lifestyle choice and not a genuine neurological difference, right?
Step 2: Issue a Warning… To YOU!
Surprise! That warning you got wasn’t for the person causing the problem—it was for you! For having emotions about it. Because expressing distress at being constantly triggered by booming subwoofers is clearly a greater threat to public safety than… you know, the actual noise.
Next time, try bottling up your sensory overload until you spontaneously combust. It’s more convenient for the paperwork.
Step 3: Offer No Solutions But All the Forms
Want to escalate the complaint? Great! Here’s a 17-page form, a PDF that won’t open on any known device, and an exciting treasure hunt to find the correct email address. Spoiler alert: it doesn’t exist.
And if you somehow do reach the right person? They’ll be “out of office indefinitely,” possibly hiding in the same dimension where lost socks go.
Step 4: Tell You to Move House
Because clearly, the best way to support a vulnerable person is to tell them to become intentionally homeless in order to escape an avoidable issue. Genius! Revolutionary! Someone give this council a TED Talk!
Step 5: Repeat Until Insanity
Then repeat all the above steps in a loop until you either a) move, b) scream into the void, or c) develop a deep-rooted distrust of local government. Or maybe all three. It’s fun!
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#NeurodivergentVoices #TewkesburyFail #NoiseComplaintNightmare #SensoryHell #CouncilComedy #AutisticAdvocacy #SatiricalTruth #MentalHealthMatters #NotAllBassIsGoodBass