Look, I get it. Some people see me as negative. Maybe it’s the way I react to things. Maybe it’s my tendency to question every “great idea” that sounds suspiciously like it’ll drain my bank account and mental stability in one go. Maybe it’s the way I instinctively flinch when someone says, “Just think positive!”—as if my life has ever been a Disney montage where problems dissolve under the power of a well-timed musical number.
But let’s be honest here: negativity isn’t always a personality trait. Sometimes, it’s just a survival instinct when you grow up in an environment where every idea you had was met with, “That’s stupid,” “No one will buy that,” or my personal favorite, “Why don’t you just get a real job?”
The Art of Dream-Killing: A Family Tradition
Imagine a childhood where you excitedly pitch an idea—maybe you want to start a small business, maybe you want to write a book, maybe you just want to see if you can train the family cat to high-five. Instead of encouragement, you get:
- “That’ll never work.”
- “People like us don’t do that.”
- “You’re wasting your time.”
- “Focus on something realistic.”
And if that wasn’t enough, let’s throw in three older brothers, all at least eight years older than me, who also weren’t exactly the “Let’s support our younger sibling’s ambitions” type. Nope. Instead, their response to anything remotely creative was usually a combination of sarcasm, dismissal, and just enough condescension to make me question all my life choices before I even hit puberty.
To them, I was either being too ambitious, too weird, or too much of a dreamer. Apparently, their job was to remind me that the world was a cold, hard place where good ideas go to die—and if I had any illusions otherwise, they were more than happy to crush them.
Realism or Pessimism? A Fine Line When Your Ideas Are Shot Down Like a WWI Fighter Plane
The thing is, when every new idea you have is treated like a terrible life decision, you start to assume everything you come up with must be bad. Over time, that youthful spark of “I can do anything!” fades into a smoldering ember of “I should probably Google whether this is a bad idea before I waste my time.”
So no, I’m not negative—I’m just pre-programmed to expect disappointment. When your early years were a masterclass in Why Bother 101, it’s a little harder to be the sunshine-and-rainbows type.
Rewiring My Brain (Or, How I’m Trying to Undo Years of Family Programming)
Now, despite all this, I am working on shifting my mindset. After all, I’ve come to realize that just because they didn’t believe in my ideas doesn’t mean they were actually bad. It just means they weren’t the kind of people who could see past their own self-imposed limitations.
And you know what? I refuse to inherit their mindset like some depressing family heirloom.
So, if I sound skeptical when people throw around “Just be positive!” like a magic spell, understand that it’s not because I’m naturally negative. It’s just that I was raised to believe every silver lining comes with a thunderstorm waiting to ruin my day. But hey, I’m getting better.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some audacious, unrealistic, totally worth doing ideas to work on—whether anyone believes in them or not.
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