Some people use live chat to ask about products. Others… apparently to ask about house bricks and deconstructed lavender. Welcome to Volume 16 of our ongoing series chronicling the bizarre moments from live chat.
1. Deconstructed Lavender for House Bricks
Visitor: “Where is the deconstructed lavender? I need some for my house bricks.”
Commentary:
Looking at our website, it should be obvious that we wouldn’t sell deconstructed lavender. Yet somehow, this question arrived. Did they imagine a new DIY trend combining aromatherapy and masonry? Or is this simply an existential query disguised as a shopping request? Either way, our bricks remain unscented.
2. Would You Bevable to Sell the Deconstructed Lavender?
Visitor: “Would you bevable to sell the deconstructed lavender?”
Commentary:
Ah, “bevable.” A verb only the most creative or sleep-deprived minds could invent. Spelling aside, our site gives no hint that Onyx Dragon sells magical plants or construction materials. But curiosity, apparently, is immune to logic. We can only admire the sheer optimism.
3. Point Me to Your Deconstructed Lavender
Visitor: “Hello. I was wondering if you could point me to your deconstructed lavender?”
Commentary:
By this point, a pattern emerges: three separate chats, three slightly different approaches, all asking about the same nonexistent product. Should it be obvious from the site? Absolutely. Does it stop people from asking? Apparently not. At this rate, we expect a “Where’s the invisible brick unicorn?” message any day now.
Lessons from Volume 16
- Humans and bots alike will test your chat widget.
- Clarity is optional in online queries.
- Patterns are funnier in threes.
- What seems obvious to us may not be obvious to everyone else.
- Sometimes, the internet just wants to see if you’ll play along.
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